The First Time Mum Bible: UK mums answer popular Google searches for expecting mothers

With over 7.9 million “pregnant” hashtags on TikTok, and 5.6 million “new born” related posts, cutting through the noise of advice for expecting mums is a big ask.

To help support pregnant women and new mums in the UK, greetings card marketplace thortful has sent popular Googled parenting questions to Brit mothers, to get the best advice from those that have been there themselves.

With Mother’s Day approaching on the 15^th March, The First Time Mum Bible covers everything from how to change a nappy, sleep habits, feeding, temperature, health, bonding, self-care for parents and everything in between from mums of different experiences.

Libby Windle, aged 38 from Doncaster, discusses her experiences with her daughter Flora, aged 6 months:

1. “How to change a nappy?” “Surprisingly, I didn’t change Flora’s nappy for a week, as I was so scared due to how tiny she was, so my husband did this. However, there were a few times I didn’t correctly fasten the top bits which resulted in quite a few accidents – mistakes will happen!”
2. “How to get my baby to sleep longer?”
   “Wrapping her up nice and warm did it for us. As a baby, she was a great sleeper! I breastfed and she cluster fed a lot between 4pm – 8pm and then she’d often sleep between 9pm- 2am before waking up for a feed. White noise helped too.”
3. “How do I breastfeed?” (specifically regarding latching and supply).
   “I have my midwife to thank for this. But, her head to my shoulder position, grab the nipple in a cup shape and guide her. Also, when they’re crying a lot at the new born stage or fall to sleep on the breast, use the crisp packet tip – crinkle them, it wakes them up and they latch again to feed.”
4. “How much milk/formula does a baby need?”
   “More awareness needs to be done on breastfed babies, I was never told about cluster feeding and wow, it was HARD! I can’t speak for formula, as I didn’t introduce this until around 5 months, and I just followed the tin instructions.”
5. “How to get rid of baby gas fast?”
   “Putting her over my shoulder worked for me. For my husband, he would sit her on his lap, and bend her back and forth, and move her bottom half around in motions – this always worked. Also, it can be down to how you feed your baby, when Flora had a bottle, she was never flat, she was elevated.”
6. “When will my baby smile?”
   “I think about 8 weeks in, she smiled?”
7. “Why does my baby spit up an hour after eating?”
   “Often because they’ve not been winded properly or you’re laying them down too quick/walking around with them to fast.”
8. “Why does my baby pinch me while feeding?”
   “This is when they’re learning to get your milk out your nipple faster! Honestly, it’s the truth, they’re smart.”
9. “Can a baby be too hot/cold?”
   “Yes, I relied on the “what to wear” style guides based on the temperate and always put my hand on her chest or back to see if she was too hot.”

Laura Fletcher, aged 32 from Beverley, discusses her experiences with her son Leo, aged 2 years: 

1.   “How to get my baby to sleep longer?”
   “A lot of my mum friends swear by adding a magnesium supplement to your little one’s milk (once they are old enough of course). I’ve still not cracked the code for this yet and you have to savour the nights you do all get some sleep and power through the ones you don’t. We use a white noise machine still for our son and remember that helped him be more settled throughout the night and undisturbed.”  
2.   “How to treat baby acne?”
   “Not acne but my son has eczema and baby Aveeno products for the bath have been the best thing we’ve found that’s not prescribed.”
3.   “Why does my baby make pig noises?”
   “Babies are such noisy sleepers! My son used to grunt a lot in his sleep. This completely took me by surprise and I wish someone would have warned me before as I panicked about this a lot when my son was a newborn. It’s completely normal though.”
4.   “Can a baby be too hot/cold?”
   “This used to be a worry of mine, especially when he was sleeping. We used a Tommy Tippee temperate egg night light in his room. The colour indicates if it’s the correct temperature for a baby or not and we found this help us determine how many layers he should be wearing etc.”

Marina Maranon aged 33 from Leeds, discusses her experiences with her son Pablo, aged 11 month: 

1. “How do I breastfeed?” (specifically regarding latching and supply).

“Breastfeeding is such a journey. My advice would be to ask for help, there’s so much support out there to help breastfeeding, I attended the breastfeeding clinic twice and it really helped with latching. There’s also a headline where you can call for support, as well as the weekly meet ups at your local children centre. The first 6 weeks were really hard, everyone told me after this point things would improve, and I really wanted to see whether that was true. I was reluctant, but things really improved after this point! In the end, it was all worth it, 6 months exclusively breastfeeding and we continue with it even with me being back at work.”

2. “How much milk/formula does a baby need?”
   “This is hard to say from my experience as I was breastfeeding, so he was eating on demand (still does). The best way to look at it when breastfeeding is too not get obsessed with tracking feeds and trying to set routines, this will only add more stress.”
3. “When will my baby smile?”
   “This will depend on the baby, but I’d say week 7-8.”
4. “Why does my baby pinch me while feeding?”
   “Babies pinch and have contact to stimulate the supply, when they are a bit older, they also start pinching on your side as they are exploring, it’s part of their sensory development. Embrace it, it’s amazing to create a unique bond with your baby!”
5.       “Can a baby be too hot/cold?”

 “Yes, babies cannot regulate their body temperature, so it’s important you are aware of the official recommendations when it comes to dressing your baby for sleeping. A room temperature thermometer can help you guide on what to put them on to sleep and always check their chest to see if they are too hot. Hope the above helps with some of the key trends, but I’d also like to add that it’s normal to be nervous when you are about to have a baby, the unknown, the ifs, the doubts etc. But it’s important to remember that you are the best mum for your baby. Don’t let others tell you what you can or can’t do, often people are quick at telling you all the ‘negatives’ or the things that you won’t be able to do when you have a baby, but silence those voices; with the right mindset you can do anything. We’ve been on a campervan road trip, hiked mountains, travel to new places and even cruising – your life doesn’t need to change, you just need to adapt to your new normal.”

Other collective advice from the mums above include:

–            Take the time to relax during the first few weeks and months, cherishing the contact naps and lean on family and friends for support around the house.

–            Learn to say NO or at least don’t be ashamed to say no. To visitors, to going out, prioritise yourself and your baby.

–            Enjoy it. Everyone says it, but time goes so quickly, it’s emotional looking back at how fast the last year has gone.

Follow the link to see thortful’s ‘Mum to be’ Mother’s Day cards here.

Image: Depositphotos